The Compulsive homemaker

It’s not much, but it’s something!

I’ve been having such a hard time finding something to knit, so I thought I’d cool my heels on a simple dish cloth. I used 100% cotton.

I have found my next project.

I found this project in the current issue of “Creative Knitting Magazine.” (The pattern isn’t on their website, so you’d have to buy the magazine to make this.) You probably can’t see it in this picture, but there are cables and eyelets running up the arms and on the feet of this ensemble. I bought the magazine just for this pattern–although, there are other nice patterns other than this. When I complete it, I’ll post a picture. I, unfortunately, do not have a girl to model it. As a matter of fact, I’m making it in hopes of having a girl some day soon! Boys are great, but not much fun to knit for. Anyhow, that’s my next project.

I bought two books at Borders the other day. Both deal with the subject of being a happy, competent housewife. One is about being a family manager, the other is about taking pride in having stay-at-home status. Interesting, huh? Well, it is to me. I want to learn the secret of a clean, smooth-running home. I want well-behaved clean kids, and dinner in the oven at the same time everyday. It’s funny, before I had my first son, being a mom was all I could think about. I tried for two years before conceiving him, and planned right away that I would be a SAHM (Stay-At-Home-Mom, for those of you who don’t know the acronym.) Then I got my wish and was immediately over- and underwhelmed at the same time. (Yes, it can happen.) When my second son came, I started to resent having kids so young. For some reason I suddenly rejected the idea of being at home with my kids. I felt like I wasn’t accomplishing anything. First, I took a part time job as a check out girl. Then, I got a job at BB&B, which is where I was until recently. I was part time and a supervisor, but I wasn’t happy when all the youngsters started getting ready for college. I wanted an education! So, I enrolled in classes. I was still unhappy, though. I wanted to have more control at work, even if that meant putting the kids in daycare! Of course, the decision wasn’t as easy as that. I agonized over it for months. Anyhow, I got that promotion and, wouldn’t you know it, I wasn’t happy. So. I am back to square one. I think this is where I belong. I let my ego get the best of me in each one of those instances. (My ego is huge and hungry.) I’ve learned, though, that I can do good at whatever I work at, even if that’s raising my kids. I wanted them. I should take care of them. Sounds really old fashioned, huh?

Some backstory: My mom spent my entire childhood and teenagerdom at home. She was there. Everyday. The house was sanitized on a daily basis. (And I’m not kidding. You could literally lick the floors if the moment moved you.) Clothes were always clean and under control. Dinner was always made, and every morning my mom would make me and my sibs sack lunches of PB & J sandwiches. Of course, I took all of this for granted. I hated that I couldn’t buy my lunch–laughable, I know, considering the quality, or lack thereof, of school lunches. I hated that my mom would pull out the broom if she felt the slightest speck of dirt on the floor. Most of all, I despised doing dishes right after eating. BUT…

Now I want to be that compulsive homemaker. I’m old-fashioned because my mom was old-fashioned. I commend and respect her for how in control she was during my younger years. So, I bought the books for pointers. Why not ask her myself? She never took shortcuts. Cleaning was her life. Unfortunately, as much as I like a clean house, I like my free time, too. I need a plan of attack.

Anyhow, why mention this all? What’s the point? I guess I just wanted to say, bring the home arts back!! I miss the time when being a mother meant something. I want to earn my Mother’s Day cards!! That’s all I wanted to say. [Steps off soap box.]

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